Growing up I was taught marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but now as a married mom of three, I disagree. I believe marriage is a partnership that is 100/100. If you’re only going to give half of yourself to your marriage why get married? Here are my five tips to have a successful marriage.
Communication is key and we all communicate differently.I took this test to see what kind of communicator me and the hubby were, I would say it hit the nail on the head. I am a passive/passive aggressor. I put other people’s need before my own and sometimes I find it hard to tell people no. On the other hand, my husband is the complete opposite. He doesn’t have any trouble telling people how he feels and has no issue with saying no to others (just our kids). It works well for us. The point is to find out what your communication style is and make it work. If you don’t have communication your marriage isn’t going to work.
Everyone needs somewhere that’s “theirs”. That includes couples. In our home, the office is my area, and the garage is his. He doesn’t fuss about my office, and I don’t fuss about the junk stuff in his area. It’s simple just give them that space, and allow them to have that time to themselves and respect that they do things a certain way. Your wife may have the office organized a certain way, or your husband may like his garage messy a certain way. Leave it the way you found it. Don’t try to change them by pushing their boundaries.
It’s the small things
Remember to show your love in small ways. My absolutely favorite thing my husband does is come home with flowers and on days, I just want to tell my husband in a little extra way I love him I massage his feet while he’d kick backed watching TV. I love you’s are always nice, but sometimes it’s the little things that really matter.
Make time for your marriage
When you get married sometimes between the house, kids, work, and everything in between sometimes you forget about your partner. If you remember in my a day in the life post, I said I always cut off the computer every night after the kids are down for time with my husband. I do this because out relationship is important. During that time, we can cuddle, chat, or whatever but the key is it our time. Now I know with kids this can be hard, but I believe it’s important enough to make an effort to have that special time.
Give and take
Remember marriage isn’t about who’s right. You don’t have to prove that you know everything. Marriage is a partnership. The most important thing you should take from this is that great marriages are characterized by finding a common ground and creating common solutions. Share the burden. Don’t always feel like you have to find the solution by yourself. Search for areas that you and your partner can agree on. Being able to compromise is key.
Bonus tip- Let your partner be their selves What I mean by that is don’t try to make them something they’re not. You partner was good enough to fall in love don’t try to make them into the perfect partner. If you truly love someone you love their flaws and all. As time goes on you will both change you just have to give your partner the space to grow instead of trying to hinder then and keep them in the role that you want them in.
Are you married? If so what tip would you give to an engaged couple or newlyweds?